Internet and Cell Phone Safety

Back in April, Woodglen School hosted programs on Internet and cell phone safety presented by the Hunterdon County Prosecutor's Office and the New Jersey State Police.  In three separate programs, officers from these law enforcement organizations met with fifth and sixth graders, seventh and eighth graders and parents.  The presentations were excellent and, more importantly, eye opening, for all in attendance.

While most of us are familiar with some of the traditional dangers of being on the internet, the cyber world is an ever-changing place where new dangers pop up every day.  Just when most parents got used to IM (instant messaging) it became passe!  MySpace faded into Facebook.  Chat rooms found their way into online gaming.  I'm sure you see where this is going.  The problem we as parents and educators face is that we just can't seem to keep pace with the evolution of technology in the "world" our children live in.

While much was covered by Detectives Melendez and Gonsalves during their parent presentation, I wanted to highlight a few items for those who could not make it or need a refresher.  In addition, there are some new developments that I've become aware of since.

I hope at this point in time reminding you all that computers should be kept in a common area of the home would be redundant.  I do know, though, that many students are using laptops and the same diligence is needed - keeping them out of private areas.  So, you do all that and feel pretty good about the level of control you have.  Does your son or daughter have an ipod touch?  If so, this is another tool that needs to be closely monitored.  With wifi access, the touch gives children access to the internet, YouTube, Facebook and a host of applications (apps) that range from useful to obscene.  If you haven't already done so, take some time to check out what is loaded on your child's ipod touch.

While there are countless programs and sites out there for you to be concerned about, there are a couple that are quite popular.  If you have an eighth grader, chances are pretty good that he or she is on Facebook.  Heck, chances are pretty good that you, yourself are on Facebook.  Users are required to approve all friends who have access to their information.  It is possible to allow anyone to view information, though, and more and more, Facebook is making this a default setting.  If you or your children are on this site, make sure to regularly check and update the privacy settings that can be found in the "account" tab.  If your child is on Facebook, it is important for you to monitor his or her account.  Check out their information, check out their posts, check out their pictures, check out their groups and check out their friends.  Amazingly enough, at age 14, some of these kids think that they have 400 or 500 (or more) friends with whom they share a great deal of information.  If there is very little activity on the account, chances are good that they have more than one account - one that they share with you and one that they don't want to see.  Some of you might be thinking that we should keep kids off Facebook altogether because of the potential abuses.  While the potential for abuse is very real, and this is a decision that parents need to make for their children, I'm not so sure that avoidance is the best route to take.  I have a 14-year old daughter who is on Facebook.  I am her "friend" and check her page regularly.  Not long ago, I discovered a post from a male classmate that was inappropriate.  I talked to my daughter about it and discussed how she should deal with this.  I also posted, right on her page, a warning to the young man about being inappropriate.  I contacted his parents and the issue was handled.  Everyone involved learned something.  Our children are "digital natives" - they have grown up with technology, they use it on a daily basis and it will continue to be part of their lives forever.  Facebook and other tools give us the opportunity and responsibility to teach our children about acceptable and ethical uses of technology. 

Want to see a site that is far more dangerous than Facebook?  Check out http://www.formspring.me/.  This site, which bills itself as a place to ask and answer questions is nothing more than a forum for hatred, harassment and bullying.  People can post "questions" anonymously, questions that are more like insults than queries. 

After spending time on computer issues, the officer's presentation turned to cell phone issues.  I would not be exaggerating if I said that most middle schoolers have cell phones.  While there are many reasons for young people to have access to this technology, cell phones may be more dangerous than computers since kids have them 24/7.  The impetus for the internet and cell phone safety program came from a phone call from a parent who found out that his daughter was "sexting," that is, sending inappropriate pictures via her cell phone.  He wanted to find a way to reach out to other parents to warn them of this practice.

While this was the first "reported" case of sexting involving one of our students, national statistics would indicate that it was probably not the only case.  In fact, the day of the program, Mrs. Hinde and I were made aware of another incident involving two different students.  The exact numbers may vary, but somewhere about 20% of teenagers admit to sending nude pictures or videos of themselves via their cell phones.  Over 10% of girls between the ages of 11 and 13 indicated that they had done this.   

Sexting has many negative implications.  First of all, taking a nude "sexual" photograph of someone under the age of 16 is considered the creation or manufacture of child pornography, even if you are taking the picture of yourself.  Sending this same picture makes you guilty of distribution of child pornography.  These are serious charges.  In some states, as a matter of fact, there has been an attempt to hold the owner of the cell phone contract, the parent, responsible for these crimes.  The second issue at play here is the fact that once sent these photographs are out there forever.  The parents who attended the session in April saw a video about a high school girl who committed suicide after her life was ruined by photographs that were texted "innocently" to a boyfriend.  Once spread these photographs ruined her reputation and made her an object of scorn and ridicule, so much so that she felt she had no other way out.

Even if your child is not involved in sexting, and most are not, cell phones do play a role in the newest form of bullying and harassment, cyber bullying.  Kids do not talk on cell phones, they text.  Some kids send 100's each day as they communicate with their friends and family.  While texting is a tremendously fast form of communication, it leaves much to be desired.  First of all, texting eliminates all non-verbal forms of communicating.  I could spend hours on why this is an issue, but the bottom line is that it leaves all conversations open to interpretation.  It is much harder to tell when someone is kidding and when they are being serious by reading a text.  Second, texting makes people very brave.  Kids will text things that they would never say to someone's face.  This false bravado leads to problems, often verbal and physical altercations.

So, with all of this, what are we supposed to do?  How are we supposed to protect our kids?  Do we take away the phones and disconnect the internet?  While that might have some short term success, I don't believe it is the answer.  We must teach our children to use technology correctly.  We must teach them the dangers of posting information or photographs.  We must teach them how to communicate via email and / or text messages.  We don't allow 17-year olds to drive a car without supervision and training, yet many of us turn our kids lose on the internet without a second thought.  How can you strike a balance and allow your child to use technology without abusing it?

1. Check on what they are doing on the computer.  Walk over to the computer unannounced while they are on it.  If they immediately minimize the screen or shut it down, they are probably doing something they shouldn't be doing.  Go on to their Facebook account.  If you don't have one, you might consider creating one and becoming friends with your child.
2. Check their text messages.  At the beginning of the school year I warned students about the dangers of texting and explain that I read my daughter's text messages.  I heard a collective gasp, indicating that they were appalled.  To me that means that not enough parents are doing the same.  I take it one step farther, I go to my phone bill and count the number of texts that were sent (available through your carrier) and compare that number to the number of texts on the phone.  If they don't match, that means that something was erased, which is not permitted - only I can erase the texts.  It takes time, but I know what my daughter is sending, and, more importantly, receiving.
3. Talk to them about the dangers and long term consequences associated with irresponsible use of technology.  Colleges and employers now check Facebook - post inappropriate photographs and you may not get in or get hired.  The photograph that you post just for "friends" can be copied and downloaded and used against you when friendships are over.  The nude photograph that you text to a boy can easily make the rounds of not just your school but many others and ruin your reputation.

I know that many of you reading this are probably saying that this information is good, but not really a concern because your child is a good kid.  Well, in our community, we are fortunate; almost every kid is a good kid.  Good kids, however, do dumb things.  Remember, we had two reported cases of sexting - both took place in your homes, on your time (one during winter break, the other during spring break) and on your phones.

The night of the parent presentation, I shared some of the questions that students asked the officers when they were in school the day before.  I prefaced them by saying that the students who asked these questions were VERY GOOD kids.  I said that if I shared their names you would either fall off of your seat or not believe me.  What did they ask?  "If I just watch a video, but don't download it, can it be traced?"  Wonder what kind of video these students were watching?  "If I send a picture of myself in bra and panties, is that illegal?"  Is there any doubt that they had already done this?

When I told my daughter that I was going to read all of her texts, in typical teenage fashion, she wondered why I didn't trust her.  I shared two things with her.  First, checking up on her made it easy for her to do the right thing.  She's a great kid who I have little worries about, but she is a teenager growing up in a dangerous world filled with enemies - people who would try to bring her down and lead her the wrong way.  By being involved I am trying to help her to continue to make the right choices whether I am standing there or not.  I also told her that I learned something from one of my favorite presidents, Ronald Reagan.  "Trust but verify," he espoused.  I would urge you to do the same.  Love your kids, enjoy your kids and trust your kids, but please, don't be naive enough not to verify!

Here are some sites you can go to for information about internet and cell phone safety:
The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children    
http://www.missingkids.com/
NJ State Police Internet Safety Tips    
http://www.state.nj.us/njsp/tech/safe-teens.html
Safekids.com    
http://www.safekids.com/

Spelling Bee Update

A little more than a month ago, I threw a couple of hard-to-spell words at you in an effort to sound impressive as I reported on Woodglen's Spelling Bee.  As I reported, eighth-grader, Valerie Noonan, carried the torch for the district into the regional finals of the 24th Annual Scripps Nation Spelling Bee.

I would venture to say that few people outside of the Noonan family made the trek to Northampton Community College in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.  If you had, you would have been treated to quite a competition.  After 23 rounds of competition, 48 of the 51 competitors had been eliminated; the two remaining competitors - Priyanka Thirumurti of Moravian Academy and our own Valerie Noonan.  After 10 rounds of head to head competition, Valerie finished in second place. 

Martin K. Till, President and publisher of the Express-Times, and the host of the bee, described this year's competition as the most exciting in the 24 year history of the regional competition.  Valerie represented our school, our district and our community well - we are very proud of her accomplishment.  Her second place finish was the best ever for a Woodglen Student, as she was one word away from qualifying for the National Competition in Washington, DC.

Congratulations, Valerie, on a job well done!

The R word ...

Special Olympics and Best Buddies International have joined together with a host of other organizations to launch a campaign called Spread the Word to end the Word.  Young people around the world are embracing this challenge as they see just how hurtful it can be to call someone a "retard" or claim that something is "retarded."  While it probably doesn't fall officially into the category of hate speech, it feels just like that to an intellectually disabled person, his or her friends and family.

Let me start out my comments by saying that I am not a fan of political correctness.  One of the costs of a free society is the fact that we need to live with people who choose to use freedoms to be rude, obnoxious and even hateful.  Given that, it is important to remember that a school setting is not the same as the outside world.  School is a place for learning; it is a place where kids need to feel safe and comfortable.

Regardless of whether we are talking about school or talking about society, there is a tenet that I believe we should all live by:  JUST BECAUSE WE CAN DOESN'T MEAN WE SHOULD.  Outlawing words should not be the job of the government, but should be the responsibility of good people who care about others.  The use of labels such as "retard" to demean others or to refer to something as stupid is simply unacceptable to good people who care about others.  Many people, young people in particular, throw terms around with little regard as to how they will affect others.  "I wasn't talking about a person" or "It means stupid, not anything against a mentally challenged person" are just a couple of the excuses that I've heard when someone was called on the carpet for using the term.

I'm not sure if you know anyone who is intellectually disabled.  I do.  Outside of their disability, most people would claim that these people are just the same as you and me.  I don't think that is true.  The intellectually disabled people that I know, young and old alike, are kinder, gentler and more innocent than anyone I know.    The people I know with intellectual disabilities don't tend to judge others, are more apt to accept others and are quick to show affection.  The intellectually disabled people I know don't feel sorry for themselves, work hard and overcome more challenges in a day than you or I will face in a lifetime. 

Being the principal of a school, I deal with hundreds of students every day.  I also deal with countless conflicts and challenges.  It is easy to get upset, frustrated and sometimes even angry.  Nothing makes me feel better than sharing some time with one of my favorite students.  She's happy.  She likes to joke around.  She understands playful sarcasm.  She loves to share her successes.  She's willing to accept help with her challenges.  She would never hurt anyone.  She always puts a smile on my face.  Oh, yeah, and she's got an intellectual disability.  Nothing makes me feel worse than seeing someone being hurtful to her by using the R-word.  You don't have to call her it, when you say it, it hurts.  You don't have to say it when she's around, her friends and family are hurt when you say it.  You don't have to be malicious when you say it, when you trivialize it, it hurts. 

When I heard about the campaign to Spread the Word to end the Word I was excited.  I was excited because this is an opportunity to do something right, not because we have to, but because we should.  If you think this whole thing is over the top and oversensitive, I challenge you to spend some time at the Special Olympics or a local Buddy Walk.  I bet if you do, you'll meet someone just like one of my favorite students.  He or she will make you smile.  He or she will not judge you.  He or she will inspire you.  He or she will convince you that we should actively work to "end the word."  Not because we must, but because we should.

If you would like to take the pledge to "end the word" you can go to http://www.r-word.org/. 

Check out actor John C. McGinley's message about Ending the R-word
at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PE_5_BbZlbI

Want to share this message with your son or daughter?  Check out Joe Jonas's message at  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8doRD9MB0Qw

The time has come to End the R-word - not because we must, but because we should.

Spelling Bee

Quick, how do you spell latitudinarian?  How about anticoagulant?  Ok, so that doesn't quite work as well as it did with the Geography Bee! 

Unfortunately for students at Woodglen School, the Annual Scripps National Spelling Bee does not provide them the words for them in print.  Fortunately, though, some of our students don't need to see the words in order to spell them. 

In January, under the direction of Mr. James Peralta, Woodglen's Enrichment Specialist, fifth through eighth graders competed in this year's Bee.  The Scripps Bee has taken place every year since 1925 when Frank Neuhauser won by correctly spelling gladiolus.  The process begins at the school level, where participating schools determine their representative to move on to the regional level.  Woodglen's champion will compete at the regional level sponsored by the Express Times.  The regional champion then moves on to compete at the national level in Washington, DC.

What does it take to be a Spelling Bee champion?  Most great spellers have a few things in common.  First of all, they are great readers.  Reading great books is the surest way to enhance one's vocabulary.  So if you want to spell well, pick up a book!  Second, they work at it.  Whether it is a word journal, having someone ask questions or even checking the dictionary on a regular basis, great spellers all have to work hard.  Finally, use spell check!  Wait a minute, that's what I do and I never even came close to winning the spelling Bee.  OK, forget that last one - if you want to go far in the Spelling Bee, you should work hard and read a lot.  Watching Akeelah and the Bee might not hurt either.

At this time, Woodglen School is proud to announce that eighth grader, Valerie Noonan is the 2010 Spelling Bee champion.  Our runner up, Paige Whitmore, is a sixth grader.  Aaron Osgood was the eighth grade runner up.  Valerie now moves on to regional competition which will take place in March. 

We are also happy to announce grade-level winners for this year's Bee:
James Webber - Fifth Grade
Niocle Kozak - Seventh Grade

We are proud to have Valerie move on to represent our school and community and look forward to watching her succeed at the next levels.  For more information about the Scripps Spelling Bee, check out their website at http://www.spellingbee.com/.

Geography Bee

Quick, what's the capital of the United States?  Everyone probably got that one pretty easily.  (Washington, DC, if you had any doubts). 

How about this one:  What empire, stretching from the Pacific Ocean to Eastern Europe during its zenith in the 13th century A.D., used the ancient city of Karakorum as its headquarters?  Well, if you were a middle school student participating in the 2010 National Geographic Geography Bee, you might just be expected to identify that empire.  For those of you who don't know, it is the Mongol Empire.  (Don't worry, if I didn't have the answer key I probably wouldn't have known it either.)

Thanks to the efforts of sixth grade social studies teacher Jessica Miller, Woodglen's sixth, seventh and eighth graders have an opportunity to participate in the Geography Bee annually. This year, our students participated in the 22nd annual National Geographic Bee which was sponsored by Google.  The process is quite extensive as students begin with a qualifying test before moving on to the school-wide bee.  Thirty-seven students qualified for the school level bee, a number which included 16 sixth graders.  These students were asked a series of questions to answer orally and the field was narrowed to nine.  The questioning continued until four students earned spots in the semi-finals:  Kaya Cousin, Philip Dacey, Connor Heft and Andrea Jindracek.

What does it take to win the geography bee?  Well, it helps to be able to answer following:

1. In which African country, founded by freed American slaves, is mask-making an art form often related to social status?
2. A North African country, with coastlines on the Atlantic Ocean and the Mediterranean Sea, allocates about 20 percent of its budget to state-sponsored education.  Name this country.
3. Which country is the world's leading producer of silver?
4. Founded as the southern terminus of a railroad line to Chattanooga, Tennessee, what city is now the major transportation center for the Southeast region?
5. What large body of water separates the Delmarva Peninsula from the southern part of New Jersey?

In the end, Woodglen is proud to announce that Andrea Jindracek is the 2010 School Geography Bee Champion.  Our runner-up, who also deserves accolades, is Connor Heft.  Andrea now moves on to take a qualifying test to determine whether or not she moves forward to the State Bee.  Only 100 students state-wide qualify for this level of participation.  Last year, Andrea not only won the school be, but moved on to state-level competition.  State Bee winners then move on to the National Finals, which are held in Washington, DC.

I want to congratulate our four semi-finalists, and wish Andrea the best as she goes forward in the competition.  The staff and students of Woodglen are proud to have such an outstanding representative.

Oh, by the way, in case you were looking for the answers to the questions above, and I know you were,

1. Liberia
2. Morocco
3. Peru
4. Atlanta, Georgia
5. Delaware Bay (if you said Delaware River, you were incorrect, sorry!)

Link to the National Geography Bee Website

Martin Luther King, Jr. Day

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
-The Declaration of Independence

As we get set to enjoy a three day weekend, I want to urge everyone to take a few moments to reflect on why we are off on Monday.

In April, 1968, Martin Luther King, Jr. traveled to Tennessee where he was shot and killed by an assassin's bullet.  The day before his death, King delivered a prophetic speech, his famous "I've Been to the Mountain Top" speech (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1L8y-MX3pg&feature=related). 

Martin Luther King, Jr., born on January 15, 1929, grew up in Atlanta, Georgia.  At the age of 15, King enrolled in college.  He earned degrees in sociology and theology and became a pastor in Montgomery, Alabama where he organized a boycott of city buses in response to the treatment of Rosa Parks, who refused to give up her seat to a white passenger.  The result of this boycott was a US Supreme Court ruling that deemed bus segregation unconstitutional.

In August of 1963, Martin Luther King, Jr. led the famous March on Washington, where a crowd of more than 250,000 blacks and whites heard his famous "I Have a Dream" speech (http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoID=1759663481).

The legacy of Dr. King lives on today, more than four decades after his death.  It is difficult to grasp the fact that in my lifetime there were Americans who were not able to enjoy basic rights in their own country.  It is difficult for me to come to grips with the fact that, while we teach about the abolition of slavery in 1863, over 100 years later, and in my lifetime, there were Americans who were not given the equality granted by the Declaration of Independence.

As a former history teacher, I know that most students look at history as a study of things that happened a long time ago.  Our children look at the mid sixties as "a long time ago."  My guess though is that most of you were alive in the mid 1960's.  Right?  As you think about the work of Dr. King, remember that he led the fight for equality for all Americans during our lifetime.  The Montgomery bus boycott took place in 1955, not 1855.  The "I Have a Dream" speech was not delivered in the time of Abraham Lincoln, it was delivered in the time of you and me. 

We live in a largely homogenous community - a very white, very middle to upper middle class community.  There is nothing wrong with that, my children have grown up in the same environment.  When we live in this type of community, however, it is easy for racism to creep into our lives.  When there is so much "sameness" it is easy for us to be critical, judgmental and scared of "differentness."  I have to say, it is refreshing to see that our students have not fallen prey to the evils of racism.  While that is a credit to their upbringing, I want to remind you that the battle cannot be considered won. 

Our kids are still young - most of them pre-teens.  As they move forward, they will be exposed to a world that is less and less tolerant.  It is true that today, in 2010, we are closer to the "dream" of Martin Luther King, Jr., but, sadly, the dream has not been totally realized.  Hate groups exist.  Racism exists.  Sexism exists.  We constantly hear about people who wield hatred and violence against others based on their religion, their color, or their sexual orientation.  As our kids move forward, we need to equip them with the tools to fight the hatred that exists outside of the protective fortresses that we have created to protect them - our schools, our churches, our homes.

Regardless of your personal morality, I am sure we all share the belief that all human beings, whether they are the same as "us" or different from "us," should be treated with respect and with the rights endowed by our creator.  As Americans, we all have a responsibility to continue to fight for Dr. King's dream that one day our children "will live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."  As Americans, we all have a responsibility to leave our children with an America where men and women stand together despite their differences.  As Americans, we all have a responsibility to assure that our country lives out the idea that "all men our created equal."

In a recent interview with the San Diego Union-Tribune, the Rev. Samuel "Billy" Kyles, who was there when Martin Luther King, Jr. was fatally shot, shared his thoughts on the state of King's dream.

"Each generation must find what it can do to help keep the dream alive," he said.  "As a witness, I can confess that you can kill the dreamer, but you cannot absolutely kill the dream.  The dream is very much alive," he said.

I Have Been to the Mountain Top

I Have a Dream

"Dream is Very Much Alive," Says Friend of Martin Luther King, Jr.

What do we teach our kids?

This past week I read two different articles about high school sports.  They were both interesting and both could teach a lesson.  The two, however, could not have been more different.

On Tuesday night, January 5, Yates High School in Houston, the nation's top high school boys basketball team, posted a 170 - 35 victory over their opponents, Houston (Lee) High.  As if 170 points weren't enough, Yates scored 100 in the first half.  (http://highschool.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=1036676)

"I feel very disrespected right now," Lee coach Jacques Armant told Jenny Dial of The Houston Chronicle. "I don't understand why Yates just kept scoring and pressing when they were up so much. These are kids. It isn't good to do that to other young men."

Yates coach Greg Wise didn't apologize for his team's play.  "We practice running, pressing, trapping every day," he told The Chronicle. "If we get to a game and I tell them not to do what we do in practice, I am not coaching well. I am not leaving my starters in the whole game. We have 15 guys, and all 15 play."

Obviously there is a difference between playing hard and running up the score.  In the end, the embarrassment was too much for Lee.  In the third quarter, one of Lee's players intentionally fouled an opponent that led to a fight on the court.  Approximately 20 players were ejected and both teams had to finish the game with only five players each. 

Whose fault is a brawl like this?  I would say it lies firmly on the shoulders of Wise, Yates' head coach.  This is the kind of thing that is wrong with youth sports.

Contrast this fiasco with the other story I saw this week.

On Monday night, Kirkwood (Missouri) High and Coach Bill Gunn demonstrated the kind of thing that is RIGHT with youth sports.  (http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/sports/columnists.nsf/bryanburwell/story/85971FDCA335EF3C862576A20018DAB0?OpenDocument)

David "Chubbs" Stillman, a four-year team manager and special needs student, took the court as a player.  So many people stepped up to make Monday night a night that "Chubbs" would never forget - Gunn who planned this night nearly two months ago, opposing coach, Chris Wilkerson of Fox High who, along with his team, set the stage for Stillman to end the game with a 3-point shot, Miles Artis, the Kirkwood teammate who gave up his number 23 jersey for the night so that "Chubbs" could wear Michael Jordan's number, Ahmad Hicks, a Kirkwood senior who lobbied the coach to get back in the game in the fourth quarter so that he could pass the ball to David Stillman, and the students and fans of Kirkwood who made the night truly unforgettable with cheers, chants and a storming of the court following the game.

I've attached both stories so that you can read them for yourselves.

The lesson, here, that I learned, is that we as adults have so many opportunities to affect the lives of young people.  Whether it is through athletics, or through our daily lives, parents, teachers, coaches and adults often forget the tremendous power we have in influencing kids.  The story of David Stillman also reminds us that even kids have the chance to make a difference in the lives of others.

Today, and every day, please be mindful of the fact that our kids learn not really from what we say, but what we do.  Kids are much more astute than we give them credit for being and they will pick up on every cue - intentional and unintentional.

The two men in the attached stories taught many lessons to young people.  You and I do that every day as well.  What kind of lessons do you want to be teaching?  We all need to think carefully before we speak, and, more importantly, before we act. 

Yates High School Scores 170-35 Victory Over Opponent

"Special" Is the Right Word at Kirkwood

Special Night for Stillman in Missouri